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Jack-Torchwood

Long Time No Post - Throwing Someone Overboard

Thanks in part to

loreleiskye and mairegirl , their posts yesterday reminded me just why I have this journal, and why I should try to get back to using it again.

I blame my lack of posting mostly to a combination of Facebook, and having a rather spectacularly bad year, where the lows have managed to thoroughly steam-roll the few extraordinary highs there have been. It’s made it rather difficult to muster the energy—or willpower—necessary to write, except for the typical short and often cryptic one-liner “sound bites” of life that Facebook thrives on. Should I ever start to Tweet—send help immediately—I’ll have completely lost it.

I’ve weathered the majority of the storm, though, and although there are a couple menacing clouds still out there that could potentially do a lot of damage, I’m hoping for the best.

One small ray of somewhat sickly light through the clouds recently, however, and the one triggered by L’s & M’s posts to write about, was making the very difficult decision to finally throw a toxic crewmember of my own over the side, a few weeks ago.

As a good captain, I did my best to parlay, though, offering the benefit of the doubt; extending a hand; reexamining my own place and understanding; looking the other way; etc., but in the end, the hurt of the original betrayal of my trust, the complete lack of honest remorse or regret, the continued lies, and the attempts to manipulate and coerce, made any reconciling utterly impossible.

I’ve never done this as plainly before, either, but after struggling with it for some time, I opted for being direct and completely honest, and told the person exactly what my thoughts and observations were, why so, and goodbye—with good wishes and a hope to someday get a clue.

From their four word response, however, I doubt that will ever happen.

I hated doing it, I hated having to do it, and I don’t ever want to have to do it again, but quite literally, like the cliché, it felt like a weight was removed from my shoulders—I should have done this much sooner.

This person proved themselves a liar, dishonest, discourteous, rude, greatly self-serving, and insidiously manipulative—and continues to be so—admittedly. Charisma is a dangerous tool in the wrong hands.

Unfortunately, due to associations, the person will still be “around,” and there is always the potential for fall out, or even continued subversive behavior on their part, but it had to be done.

Life is just too short to suffer a fuck-wit like this.

Anyway, I hope to find the time and energy to post here again more frequently, and thanks again to

loreleiskye and mairegirl , for inadvertently clearing out the cobwebs for me—I really needed to get this off my chest.

 

Comments

Not entirely sure what to say- but I'm reading.

Yes -agreed 120%- Charisma can be a dangerous thing.

I may have to borrow the phrase 'f*ck wit' from you wat some point.

Welcome back to the land of LJ *smile*
You know I agree with you on the charisma thing, having been burned by it more than once myself.

And Twitter is for old people. Not us. :)
Sometimes housekeeping sucks, especially cleaning out the irritants from your life. But it's usually worth it.

Have missed you, brother--welcome back!
When i finally got onto Facebook, one of my first thoughts was "facebook is the "starter drug" for twitter.

I think a lot of folks go in waves in posting to LJ. But I use LJ for more of my inner brain, and facebook for keeping track of folks.
FB is useful for day-to-day trivia. I like knowing what people are doing - are they up, are they down.

If I have anything of content, it goes on LJ. And I completely hear you on the energy thing. My LJ lately has been stuff that doesn't require thought but that I want to ramble on about because it makes me happy. Or tired.

This person proved themselves a liar, dishonest, discourteous, rude, greatly self-serving, and insidiously manipulative—and continues to be so—admittedly. Charisma is a dangerous tool in the wrong hands.

Wow... Yeah, I can relate. BIG TIME. Good riddance, and I'm glad for you that you had the strength to heave-ho the toxicity.
I guess i should count myself lucky that i have no idea who you're talking about. Sure, its possible i know this person, but since i'm clueless about who it could be, it means that whatever their drama, i remain blissfully ignorant. It sucks that they put you in this position, but having been there with other friends at other times, I can understand your decision, and support it. You have to do what you have to do to make sure that their drama doesnt negatively impact your stress level, your sanity, your friendships or relationships with other people, and your own peace of mind.

FB for me is for games and quick little posts. I am technically on twitter, but have not tweeted in a very VERY long time. There are other sites that occupy my time, but free time is a bit of a luxury for me right now.
I understand the need to clear negative untrustworthy people from your life.We have had to do that a bit too much recently. It sucks that they will still be around, and yes Charisma is a very dangerous tool. Life is too short to allow fuck-wit's to ruin it for the rest of us. Welcome back friend.
Well, good for you. Life is short and hard enough as it is without people actively trying to make it worse. Sorry to read your year was so difficult. Must be something going around.
(((HUGS)))